Sleeping Amongst The Trees, Breathe In And Out Through The Leaves

Creatures of destruction.



Oh boy, once again I've left this poor 'lil blog in the dust whilst the wheels of my life speed me off into the sunset.

I'll start with more recent news, which is the celebrations of Thanksgiving. I saw a lot of family, a lot of friends. It was great to see everybody again. I happily ate all the parts of the meal which did not consist of meat, and I was entirely satisfied! I got to see my Neice, babies turn into people real fast. A month goes by, and she becomes a new person. Scary.

Besides my little journey into Ingersoll this past weekend I've been here in Toronto almost exclusively. I work a lot. I just got a raise actually. They must like me, or maybe they just figure they need me.

I have had a few little journeys up to Sauble Beach area though with my good friends Aaron and Tyson and a certain lady friend. It was amazing to get away for a few days and unwind. I needed it.

And yes, I have been seeing a girl. I'm pretty sure she's the sweetest thing in existence. She occupies my thoughts constantly.

"She's Standing Alone Cuz She Can't See Me By Her Side"

It's kind of funny sometimes how I use this blog. When something truly profound is happening, I tend not to update. When I'm bored, that's when I update.

Well, a lot has happened. Much worthy of an update. I broke up with my girlfriend. Since we lived together this was a very complex and uncomfortable situation. I have been staying with some friends for the past month or so who have been gracious enough to open their doors to me. I'm moving into my new apartment at the end of the month, which is actually in just a week.

So how about that, it's been a month since it all happened. I'm finally putting it in here now. Maybe at the time I was worried about putting an entry in that was too emotional and vivid. Maybe I didn't know what to say. Maybe I never do.

Fitter. Happier. More Productive.

There's so much that is different now. I'm sinking into this new city. I'm settling into this new lifestyle.

Today I started a new job. I'm delivering for a local brewery here in Toronto, Amsterdam. So if you're ever in the city enjoying some Amsterdam on tap, thank me. Mail me a cheque maybe? Just for fun? I will also accept joints as thanks.

Anyways, it's a pretty decent job. Better than my previous one. Very physical work. I'm enjoying physical work these days though.

It seems like maybe this summer I won't be able to do all that much besides work, unfortunately. I think I may attempt to travel somewhere in the fall..I'll try and recruit a friend or two and get away somewhere on a little roadtrip. Oh, how I love roadtrips. On the brightside, once I am experienced enough I'll be able to go outside the city on some delivery runs. Peterborough is one destination I'm told we have.

Anyways, such domestic nonsense. No one cares about my work. I wish I had some interesting philosophical things to say. Perhaps I could expel some theories. Illuminate some new plane of thought. Instead all I can think about is driving around Toronto in a van delivering beer.

I actually am working with an old friend of mine at my one job. He's from Ingersoll. Small world. So I've been over there and spent some time hanging out with him, and another old friend of mine that he lives with. At their place - in the common room - they have these old typewriters. I've decided that I love typewriters. I've decided that I'm buying one. The physical act of pressing each key and the mechanical response that it creates makes it much easier to write. To form thoughts. I'm able to write paragraph after paragraph with them. Beginning soon I'm going to start hunting for one. I'll search every obscure shop in this town until I find one.

And then pages of nonsense will finally have an outlet through which they can pour out of my mind.

Music:
The White Birch

"Don't Go Back To Warn Them"

I love going for drives. I always have. As soon as I got my licence, I began to go for drives. A simple trip to a neighbouring town rarely consisted of the simplest, most direct route. I liked to go the long way. Sometimes I would spend an entire day driving to some obscure destination. Sometimes it was the lake. Sometimes it was the middle of nowhere.

So it was today that I suddenly felt a compulsive desire to go for a drive. See, when I lived back in Ingersoll I felt sort of like I had exhausted each direction. I'd already been everywhere. Now that I'm in Toronto I've got plenty of destinations around the city that used to be a four hour drive that I can reach in under an hour now. Granted, I have to deal with evil Toronto traffic, but once I'm past that there's a million little unexplored roads for me to cruise down.

I used to have a few friends who I considered wing-mates for these expeditions. One of us would drive and the other would scrutinize a map and tell the driver where to go. Eventually we'd switch. Today I didn't have a wing-man. That's ok though, because sometimes I like to go for drives by myself. It's calming. It clears my head. It's a lot harder to navigate though.

Today I decided to go to a private airport near Markham. I'd read that the place not only had working, modern planes but was also a quiet RCAF graveyard. For those who don't know what I'm talking about, there are old Canadian Forces fighter jets there. I looked on Google's satellite view and, sure enough, the jets are there. Planes that may have flown in the Korean War and served in the the Sixties and Seventies. Pretty exciting stuff for a geek like me.

So I got in my car, with my camera by my side and made the trip up there. A few relics greet me on my way up the driveway. Upon arriving I find the airfield is gated and fenced in. I figured that if I asked and said that I am a photographer, that the guys would have no problem with it. I mean, they would want to share the history with others, right? Wrong. The guy tells me no one is allowed on the field, because they don't want people messing with members' planes. I said I have no interest in touching anyone's planes, I just want some photos. He says "no."
I stare at him for a moment, look back out at the jets, look back at him and say "What are you doing with all these planes?"
He replies "It's a museum."
I said "So it's a museum, but no one's allowed to look?"
"Yes" he says.

Double U Tee Eff.

What's the point of having these relics if they are just going to jealously keep them to themselves and let them rot in a field? They do have four jets on display, inexplicably surrounded by abandoned portables. So I shot a bunch of photos of those and then carried on with my little drive.

Here's a few photos from my day:

I don't think this one is actually a RCAF jet.


This one definitely is though.

"Don't Let The Darkness Eat You Up"

Almost one month ago today I officially moved to Toronto. Not a lot has really happened. I go to a lot more shows now. I go out a lot more than I used to, even if I have considerably less money than I used to. I hear a lot more languages than I used to. Really everything is different, except me.

My friend Chino came down last Sunday and we attended a show together. It was good. Nice to have a familiar face around at least for a little while.

I found out that this guy whom I used to know back when he lived in Ingersoll works at the same store as me in Toronto. Small world. Very small indeed.

As more time goes by I'm becoming more and more at home here, but I'm still not entirely. I still go back to Ingersoll about once a week. While I'm there I usually work with my mom on her gardening expeditions, attempting to negate the price of the gas to get there. I tend to my flocks of animals. I work at cataloging my massive album collection. I see my friends and family. Already though, I don't feel quite at home there. Strangely though I don't entirely feel at home here either..I'm in a state of perpetually feeling like a stranger everywhere I go. I've always craved that really. In Ingersoll for awhile I was very well known. I hated it. When everyone thinks they know you, they think they know things about you.

I like being able to walk down the street and not having people recognize me. I like being anonymous.

Toronto has been good for me creatively. I have been playing my guitar a lot more frequently. I've been listening to tons of music. I've even been writing a new song. I read lots and take lots of pictures. And there's a lot to take pictures of.

I think I can see myself being here for awhile.

"Relocation Swarm"

There's lots of stuff to take pictures of in the city.

Alright, so I haven't started updating more frequently. But hey, it's been a busy time for me! Moving and all..Ok, there's no excuse really.

So I did the move. I live in Toronto now. It's great. The change is so very refreshing. With the move comes new work..a new life. The only problem is I don't work enough. I'm told that will change.

It's not all great though, because I was forced to leave my friends behind. I don't really have any friends here..But what could I do really? It's sweet having the friends around, but on the other hand I was unhappy with work and all other aspects of my life..so something had to give. It's cool though because I have a spare room in the apartment with a bed in it, so friends can come up to the city and hang out.

I'm still considering selling the car. I'd be so well off financially if I didn't have the car, and had a couple grand instead. Fuckin cars.

Don't You Ever Get Lonely?

This picture is actually correctly sized, if you want to open it and such. I have photoshop now!


Ok, again..the absence of posts. I know people who update their blog daily, even multiple times daily. I'm going to try to update this more frequently. I swear.

So I'm taking care of my place while my parents are gone. Today makes it a week that they have been gone. They went to visit my sister in Nova Scotia. I'm slightly jealous. I'm also slightly disappointed because I told them, with my experience, to check out the Cabot Trail..and they are ignoring my sage advice! Like what the eff. Their loss I guess.

So at any rate, since they're gone I had a wicked party on Friday night. Lots of people came out and nothing got broken, nobody got in a fight..everything worked out. I made sure to hide valuables and breakables. I wanted to have another party this Friday, but my kitchen ceiling is leaking water from the pipes that go to the bathroom upstairs..so I might not. I don't know. It sucks a lot though.

When my parents get back, things are going to start changing in my life. I quit my job..and I'm leaving this shithole town. I'm going to stay with my girlfriend in Toronto for awhile. I actually have a job interview tomorrow. I'm really excited, to get out of this town. I'm very unhappy here.

Another factor for the move is that I figure I won't receive any OSAP for school whilst living with my parentals. I've heard some horror stories about people getting accepted to school, then getting rejected and left with the huge bill to somehow pay themselves because they are still living at home. I don't really have thousands of dollars sitting around, nor do I have the desire to take out a bank loan, therefore OSAP sounds lovely.

I might take my car off the road..because really cars are a huge fucking weight..a huge burden. I am curious what life is like without one, because I've had one for so long..I almost forget what it's like not having one. But they're so fucking expensive. Even if nothing goes wrong, regular maintenance is awful. I hate forking over all that money all the time.

So the band is kind of done, since I'll be in Toronto and all. On top of that, I believe Chino is moving to London. I don't know, it just doesn't seem to be possible for it to work out. It seems like the band is just supposed to break up sometimes.

"There's A Bird Stealing Bread That I Brought Out From Under My Nose"

Fack. I keep failing at updating this blog. It's not even that I have nothing to say. I have lots to say nowadays.

For example, I bought the Macbook. It's glorious. I've barely begun to scrape the surface of the programs and potential of the computer. It shall serve me well for years to come. Next purchase: a new lens.

My photography efforts are continuing. I got a second shoot, which I completed last Monday for another local band; Newborn Genocide. The same guys I was trying to shoot before, who I couldn't seem to get to commit to it. They contacted me, so we spent an afternoon shooting in abandoned and creepy places because, of course they're metal. I've received another offer for a shoot, this time from a girl who wants pictures with her niece and nephew. Not exactly my forte, but experience is key at this point.

My band continues to practice, slowly gaining momentum. We have managed to add a second practice each week, and we're considering adding a fourth member to the group. We could definitely benefit from the more fleshed-out sound that we would receive from that move.

Last night Aaron and I drove to London to check out the Murder By Death show, which we were late for. Apparently, it was an early show. I was pretty sad. I payed the two dollar cover for Raygun(retro dance party Call The Office style) just so that I could find the band and buy some stuff. They have the coolest shirt designs. So to make ourselves feel better, Aaron and I went back to his place and cooked a bunch of weed cookies. It is 4/20 today.

Band practice tonight+weed cookies=good times.

Today's Musical Recommendation: Murder By Death

"Everything Will Not Be Made Right"

Someone's dog.


So much for that plan. Due not at all because of a lack of ambition on my part, I'm not going Wwoofing out East this year anymore. Doing so would require leaving my lady behind. It's a pretty long story, but let's just say due to family issues (a wedding) she isn't able to come. I was pretty fucking disappointed for awhile..and even a little angry, I'll admit. But I don't want to broadcast the details for everyone to hear..so I'll leave it at that.

So, I'm left with a now empty year. On the plus side, not going has propelled my ambitions of photography school. I'm currently in the process of securing the credentials necessary to apply. I'm going for Fanshawe currently. Their course for the fall is still open. If I don't get into it, I'll have to wait for the next year's program..and I'll apply to Sheridan as well as Fanshawe (a second time).

And, on a related note I did a photo shoot for a local band known as Brand New Eyes. I didn't charge them, since I'm pretty new in the game. I got as much out of it as they did anyways. So now they have some pretty decent promo pictures to use and I have some more experience. I've told them the invitation is open to do a second shoot if they're interested. Hopefully they are...haha

In other news I'm also considering going out West for maybe a month or so..I haven't been there since I was about 8. I want to see the Yukon. And I have friends and family out there. So hopefully I can do that.

Finally, I may soon have my precious Macbook. Oh yes, she will be mine..oh yes.

On another note, I have been finding vandalism around Toronto that says simply "Tofu". I think it's awesome.
Here it is:

"It's all about escaping"

Well I've finally figured out a way to break free of this town for awhile. It's called wwoofing. Working on organic farms. The deal is essentially you sign up to this organization and gain access to hosts across the country. They provide you with room and board (if you're lucky also with experiences, fun and stuff) and you work for them a bit. There's a large variety to be had...from working hostels, to straight up farms, to self sufficient farming co-ops, to whale watching outfits. It's a cheap and different way to travel. So I've been contacting a few hosts, and so far the responses have been warm and receptive. Pretty stoked for this adventure. In between I'm going to visit some national parks and camp and stuff. I have about three months to blow on this adventure. Oh, by the way it's the East Coast again. Maybe when I come back, I'll head straight out West if I still have any money left.

So be jealous, because this is likely going to be the experience of a lifetime. Be very jealous.

Today's musical recommendation: Evaline

You said "my life's like a bad movie"

And so it goes, another month, another singular update. The infrequent nature of my posts would lead one to believe that each post would be full of information and sweeping news of change and revolution in my life, but they aren't. They just aren't.

So here I sit, in this frigid February weather, with a warm pot of tea next to me and little frozen bits of ice flying sideways through the air outside my window. I think a few people got a little too excited by that "warm" spell we had. I think a few people made the mistake of daring to hope winter was dying. I think a few people are pretty disappointed.

My life hasn't been all that update worthy lately. I just work a lot. I spend a lot of my free time with my girlfriend. I'm putting disgusting amounts of mileage on my car.

Went to Montreal though. It was my first time really being in Montreal. I've driven through the edges of it several times on my journeys, even going so far as to stay in a Hotel somewhere along the southern edge. So I finally experienced the city. What a beautiful, cold city it is. Explored the older sections and the underground. Took the Metro. I like it there. The trip was capped off with a visit to the Museum of Contemporary Art. Claude Tousignant's work was on display. I became rather interesting to the prowling security folks because of the camera I had on..Imagine appreciating a piece of art, then looking to your left directly into the eyes of a staring, suspicious individual, who immediately glances away. A little disconcerting.

Work on the East Coast Movie continues to chug along. A little tedious at times, but quite hilarious as well. We have gotten rough work as far as Day 7 now, and it's funny watching ourselves transform into babbling psychotic shells of ourselves as the trip wears on. I can't wait until we get to week two.

I don't know if I ever addressed the fact that I never moved into Matt's place. Because I never did it. I decided his place wasn't set up for three people to live in. Because it isn't. Only two bedrooms. Now my girlfriend wants me to move out West for the summer. I really do want to do it..I've just never lived with a girl before. That's the only cause for my reluctance. I will be thinking about this a lot this next little while.



Today's Musical Recommendation: Irepress

The Only Survivor Was Miraculously Unharmed

I still buy albums, you know. There's something soothing and intensely addictive about owning albums. Of feeling the liner notes, and looking at the art. Of actually listening to an entire album from end to end, instead of just picking a song here, a song there...or letting the random inclinations of iTunes to pick for me. Don't get me wrong, I also exploit the many advantages of digital music. I have much of my library on the computer. I own an Ipod, albeit a tiny Shuffle. But I still like owning the albums themselves. I hope there never comes a day when people stop buying music. Sure, there's reason to dislike major labels. But looking at the success of Radiohead and NIN's DIY approach, I'm sure there's a future in it. Furthermore, both of those bands proved that people will most definitely pay for music, when the product is worth it. I also read that Vinyl sales this year were approximately 90% HIGHER than last year. Holy shit. Maybe I should get into that.

In other news, I finally got my amp back. Never again will I enlist the services of Long and McQuade. Over two months is an absolutely appalling amount of time for any repair. Completely unacceptable.

I've given the shots of Terrorhorse I took to Matt, my friend and guitarist in the band. So this will be my first "published" work. Assuming they do post the pictures, which I'm pretty sure they will. Still haven't taken any pictures of my other friends' band. The ball is entirely in their court, I'm offering my services for FREE..but they still haven't taken advantage of it. Their loss.
hah

I'll Be Waiting, At The End Of The Line

Ok, Ok, I know I haven't been updating this ol' blog of mine very much these days. In fact, there was not a single update for the entire month of December. I did start writing an entry one day, but I gave it up for some reason.

There just didn't seem to be much to say.

I've had a fairly busy Christmas this year, with a number of friends and my beloved sister returning from their now distant homes and commitments. Also the usual Christmas dinners and parties and throw New Years in there for good measure too. So I'm taking it easy for awhile because that shit exhausts me.

I've been spending a lot of time with my lady friend, she's pretty rad. Soon she goes back to school though, so maybe I'll be on the computer more, once again.

Me and my homies have started playing on a once-a-week basis in my house, trying to recapture the magic of our music. I'll say this, I need to start practicing more again. My guitar skills have certainly atrophied to a disgraceful amateur-ish level. My songwriting abilities remain intact.

In other news, Aaron and I have started the massive task of creating a movie out of the footage from our trip this past year. We finished Day One the other day, expect that silly crap to be posted in my trip blog, as a compliment to the written journal which already exists there. iMovie is fun.

Today's Musical Recommendation: Bon Iver